What's the point?
I?ll never last for long.
I never do.
Coddled for to long I?m rotten.
How will I learn to live
When everyone is living for me?
The page is blank, the pen is dry.
My thoughts grow numb inside my skull.
I hate it. I hate it all.
I hate myself more than anything.
Even as I put my soul on paper,
The time is ticking, passing by.
I feel like a useless wretch.
Again I shut the sadness out,
Lost within my little game.
Turn my back, ignore the pendulum.
Cause when I think about it I freeze.
Instead of ink I write with tears.
And even as I turn away I know.
I know I?m wasting time.
I hate it. I hate it!
I hate myself for letting it go by.
Why do I have to be this way?
Why did you raise me like this?
Why is my mind so broken!?
I don?t want to go on.
There?s nothing left.
No reason to try.
I?ll let it go?


Penned by my hand on the 17th of Daedalan, in the year 631 AF.