Text-Based RPGs: Good Grief! - A Guide to Griefing in Text Games

text game griefing charlie brown style

By Chris J. Johnston

In an online text game where might usually makes right and death is not permanent, the best way to get your text enemy to admit defeat is to grind them into the ground so hard that they don't even want to play. If there are no enemies to fight, then obviously you win the text game!

There are several tried and true methods of making people rage-qq a text game, and in almost all scenarios, the best objective is to kill them repeatedly and simultaneously deny them any possible form of retribution. Here are the best ways to rub salt in wound:

1) Gear up!
You can't very well grief someone if you're dying repeatedly yourself. So, grab all the highest-quality gear you can: offensive, defensive, utility-everything. If you can afford it, buy it! One of the easiest ways for a person to get depressed in a text game is to discover that they can do nothing to stop you in a one-on-one fight. When you are able to curb stomp almost everyone in the game by yourself, you can use that advantage to talk smack: a quintessential skill of the griefer. Along that vein...

2) LOL it up!
Make it seem like your only objective in the text game is to make them stop playing. It is, isn't it? They want you roleplay? LOL, an online text game with such a complex combat system is meant to be played for the combat. If someone bothers you about roleplay, just say that it is your duty as a servant of to slay its enemies until they join you. Whenever possible, remind your target that you are having way more fun than they are. "LOL, you died to that? ROFL, you newb! U r so bad @ this u should qq."

3) Bring your friends!
Why bother taking thirty seconds to kill your griefee if you can kill them in five with a friend or two? If your target starts asking/whining/attempting to taunt you about using friends just to kill them, then you need only remind them that you can still kill them by yourself! Besides, everything is more fun with friends. You'll probably need them as well when your target tries to get vengeance on you by ganking you with their friends (if they have any). Once you have your text posse, gank anyone and everyone that so much as looks as you wrong, making sure that you exploit any tactic possible for efficiency.

4) No escape!
A successful text game griefing requires that the target is able to do nothing, for fear of death at your merciless hand! If they leave their safe place, you must IMMEDIATELY track them down and make them pay for their forgetfulness or stupidity. While you are logged into the text game, they should be afraid to move. Included in this section is the need to make your ganks unstoppable. Hinder them so they can't get away; seal them into a room they can't get out of; remove any avenue of escape possible; leave them with no hope. If they can't do anything in the game without dying, why play at all?

5) Keep a safe room!
As a prominent griefer you will likely have all sorts of people trying to make you pay for your actions. If you are good enough and artied enough, this should already be difficult for them. Still, it is best to make sure you are only ever on the right side of deathsight. This further demoralizes your target. This means that you should have your own safe place. Be it in a city, a house or an island, it should be fortified enough that they either can't get it into it at all, or it would be suicide to try.

Remember, as a text game griefer it is your job to cull the ranks of 'noob's and people you generally don't like, and it is your calling to abuse glaring issues of the text game's mechanics and policies. After all, you only want to help! Right?

Disclaimer: This is a humorous article, and does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of Iron Realms Entertainment, or even necessarily Chris himself. For more information about Iron Realms Entertainment's policies on griefing, please see HELP GRIEFING.

Try out some great online text games for yourself today!

Chris J. Johnston is a text game enthusiast and currently plays games from http://www.IronRealms.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Chris_J._Johnston

Comments

I giggled!

Take out all the aspects of killing and death (well maybe not all) and you can apply the same techniques to socio-political griefing, too. You don't (always) have to kill people to make them quit playing!

how very true.

I like that point.

The sociopaths will agree with that, I'm sure :P

 

It's cuz we have the most fun.

It's cuz we have the most fun.

Just because they threaten you doesn't mean you have to run away. Luckily, if you're an Apostate or someone that can cast curses, stare some fear into them!

Someone's taken my plans for Krondor and posted them!!

Not happy!!

I'm sure it was one of them that did it. Bastids. Time to put on my griefer pants.

ha!

These are SO TRUE.. I laughed really hard though. Some fond memories at the least.

See: Bonko

nice article

Yeah, griefing is a thing all right.

I am a newbie. Nobody griefed me so far in Achaea, and this helps!

I can think of a few people who must have a copy of this article triggered on log in.

Time to put them into action!

Oh so THAT'S what griefing is! I do that all the time on FB-like tower/tycoon games. If someone attacks me with their mob, attack them back 20 times!

This is for giggles. Last thing we need is someone giving pointers to griefers. How I despise the "Umad brah!!one11!" junk. Ugh.

I am amused.

nice tongue-in-cheek article.  Some of those tips are actually genuine, too.  Safe room is important.

nice tongue-in-cheek article.  Some of those tips are actually genuine, too.  Safe room is important.

They're no good.

people really did this...tsk

people really did this...tsk

Pretty sweet science.

what's up, charlie brown?

What about when the game itself is griefing you?

 

What about when the game itself is griefing you?

 

Bah

Oh, good grief!

Certainly handy tips, I think.

This is great! I love it!